Sometimes... Sometimes

This morning was just one of those mornings. Definitely not in a bad way but in an interesting way. For some odd reason or another my body decided just 3 hours of sleep was fine as I woke up at 4:30 am. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal I would typically just roll over and fall right back to sleep but that was not the case for this morning. At 4:30 in the morning my mind and heart was racing just with all different thoughts, feelings, and emotions. I don't know where this came from or why it decided to happen to me at a peculiar hour. So naturally I just accepted it and really just let my mind flow with thoughts and my heart flow with these mixed emotions instead of just trying to shake it off. I am so excited for the mission but also so nervous or better yet anxious. Just thinking about it and how much of a change it will bring in me excites me but wondering if I can make a difference in lives makes me nervous. As I reflected I wondered to myself if I was able to make a difference in someone's life especially in these past couple years as I started to try and grow up a bit. I mean this is something that we may never know but we can only hope for by being the best you you can be. I have seen this in my own life from those who have made a difference in my life by just being the example of someone that I want to be and I want to emulate that. I feel as if sometimes I can get into a ramble and things don't make sense and I apologize for that and hope that you can get the idea of what I'm trying to say through it all anyways. I just want to end this post by posting some lyrics from a song that are touching to me and actually gave me a bit of an outlook on things. The song is Anyway by Martina McBride. We sang this song in choir when I was a junior and although its just a song it at least made me think. It says "You can spend your whole life building Something from nothing One storm can come and blow it all away Build it anyway You can chase a dream That seems so out of reach And you know it might not ever come your way Dream it anyway" and it ends with "You can pour your soul out singing a song you believe in that tomorrow they'll forget you ever sang, Sing it anyway." So as we go through life we might think that things might not turn out the way we want it to but we need to do it anyway cause maybe it will and you never know who might be watching. So when you don't think anyone is going to enjoy what your singing, sing it anyway cause that can be something that just one person needed! Now I know that sometimes we need those days to just think about things... sometimes.